Mixed Media Collage titled Life Weavings by Jo Ann Brown-Scott copyright 2014
It occurs to me that the Year Long Canvas of which I have been writing in my recent posts is humming along at the speed of life – one day at a time – with some days more attentively dedicated to it than others. What else can a painting ask for? I mean really, I have worked on many canvases for months, on and off, off and on, and at the end the best I can do is to call it DONE, with many unrealized possibilities for its final form still floating around in my brain. In my sleep. In my waking hours too. But I had reached my limit of endurance for working on it and so it stays where it is for all eternity…I have a long way to go before I make that decision on the Year Long Canvas.
All you can do in life is to take each day, doing the best you can, 24/7, under the circumstances of the situation you have to work with. That is the best scenario you can hope for with any of your endeavors. You cannot be expected to perform based on information you do not yet have….you have only the NOW’s worth of information to go on.
It you look back at any kind of big thing or event or occasion or circumstance in your entire life, (and this usually happens when you can’t sleep at about 3 am) and you begin to second-guess the way you handled it, questioning the decisions you made at the time, and believing that you might have done better in hindsight, try to remember all the extra-curricular stuff that was going on in your life at the time. Chances are you had a lot going on – a lot to deal with – many shades of gray to be considered. All of that factored in to the way you handled things at the time. There was more going on than just the activity in the center ring at your circus of life. You were juggling and trying to keep a lot of balls in the air.
So go easy on yourself. I am certainly trying to do that myself. Seems to me that our lives are all like paintings, and we have a lifetime to paint them with endless possibilities for the composition. We make choices based upon what we know at any given time.Then we make more alterations, more changes, more adjustments and we paint some more, eliminating the negativity and giving prominence to the positive. We brighten the color, then we tone it back down. We try new things or we revert to an old idea and make it new again. This is art at the speed of life and life at the speed of art. I think it’s all the same thing.
Thank you Jo for your thoughts. One does not remember that “gray ” area when they reflect on their past failures!!
Thanks for your comment – always nice to hear from a person who is listening and wiling to say so!!
Fantastic! Thank you.
Hey! I am sure you knew all that! You are so wise and wonderful….thanks for commenting “E”
It seems like you were speaking directly to me. This is almost to the day, a year since my sisters passing. I still question my inability to sense the desperation in Darlene’s heart. My brain knows I was juggling as fast as I could, she was too. Hind sight is 20-20, but, so narrow and specific it turns everything to black and white. Your words (voice) reminds me that life is a kaliediscope of colors, hues,tints, patterns and processes. Life is a mavelous mixed media work of art when lived to its fullest. Though still searching for my new normal and balance you again inspire creativity. Creativity is likely the light at the end of this tunnel.
Oh Chris if I managed to help even one tiny dot I am grateful – I think of you often – I know it is a winding road – a process – to get through the tragedies of life.
It sounds to me like you are on the path to healing now, and I do believe that all kinds of creativity – art, writing, even just cooking and a lot of other things can be turned into a meditation
that brings healing. I miss you and I think the world of you – Much love, jo